艾莉·伍茲過着無憂無慮的生活,可以說她是應有盡有。她是一個來自熱帶夏威夷的女孩,女大學生聯誼會會長,在她大學的日曆上她是 「六月小姐」,但首先她是一個天生麗質的金髮碧眼美女。
艾莉正在與學校中最酷的男孩華納戀愛,並一心一意想做他的新娘——華納·亨廷頓三世夫人。但是,有一個問題使華納對艾莉的求婚欲說還休,那就是:艾莉除了金髮碧眼的美貌外實在沒有什麼可吸引人的。
在洛杉磯艾倫·斯班林街對面長大對於某些人來說可能意味着什麼,但對東海岸貴族出身的華納一家人來說什麼也算不上。因此,當華納打點行裝前往哈佛法學院與一個預備班的舊情人團聚時,艾莉明白了自身的不足。她也竭盡全力考進了哈佛大學,決定要贏回華納的心。但是法學院與她以前的舒適環境——池邊的草地、林蔭道實在是天壤之別。艾莉有生以來第一次必須進行一場戰鬥——為了她心愛的人、為了她自己、也為了那些每天都無休止地承受着羞辱的金髮碧眼美女。自從選擇律師的職業以後,艾莉積極刻苦進取,並用正義與社會中的種種醜惡現象作鬥爭,最終在一次法庭上的精彩審問不僅使案件水落石出,也一舉成名,華納·亨廷頓三世再次向她說愛,但被她宛然拒絕,她要開始屬於她自己的新的生活。
There, right there
看那兒,對就是那兒!
Look at that tan well-tended skin
看那曬到黃褐色恰到好處的皮膚
Look at the killer shape he's in
看那辣死人不償命的結實線條
Look at that slightly stubbly chin
看那精心刮過胡茬的下巴
Oh please, he's gay, totally gay
哦天他是基佬,絕對是
I'm not about to celebrate
我可沒準備去慶祝
Every trait could indicate
所有特徵都暗示着
A totally straight expatriate
他是個標準異性戀僑民
This guy's not gay
那傢伙不是基佬
That is the elephant in the room
這是個被忽視的嚴重事實
Well is it relevant to presume
就這麼假設
That a man who wears perfume
一個噴香水的男人
Is automatically radically gay
自動地徹底地與基掛鈎可以嗎?
But look at his coiffed and crispy locks
但你看他那梳得油光水滑一絲不苟的頭髮
Look at his silk translucent socks
看他那光滑的半透明絲襪
There's the eternal paradox
這可是個永恆終極悖論
Look what we're seein'
瞧,我們看到了什麼
(What are we seein')
——我們在看什麼?
It's hard to guarantee
這還真是難以擔保……
Is he gay or European
他是基佬還是歐洲人?
(Well, hey, don't look at me)
——哎,看我幹嘛啊
You see, they bring their boys up different
你知道在那迷人的異邦
In those charming foreign parts
男孩子們可是以不同的方式被撫養
They play peculiar sports
他們玩着古怪的運動
In shiny shirts and tiny shorts
還穿着亮閃閃的襯衫和超級小熱褲
Gay or foreign fella
基佬還是異邦人?
The answer could take weeks
答案恐怕得耗上數周揭曉
They both say things like ciao bella
他們會一邊說着「再見了美人」
While they kiss you on both cheeks
一邊親吻着你的雙頰
(Oh please, gay)
——哦拜託,基佬——
so many shades of gray
真是撲朔迷離
Depending on the time of day
取決於一天的時辰
the French go either way
法國人就亦彎亦直
Is he gay or European or
他是基佬還是歐洲人,或者——
There, right there
那兒!給我看好了!
Look at that condescending smirk
看他那虛情假意屈尊紆貴的笑
Seen it on every guy at work
上班族哪個不是這個樣
That is a metro, hetero jerk
不過就是個異性戀都市佬
This guy's not gay
那傢伙不是同性戀
That is the elephant in the room
這是個被忽視的大問題
Well, is it relevant to presume
你怎麼去推證
That a hottie in that costume
那個披着完好偽裝辣透了的傢伙——
Is automaticaly radically
Ironically, chronically
諷刺地長期地
Certainly, flirtingly
無疑地中肯地
Genetically, medically
生理上地醫學上地
Gay, officially gay
是基!佬!嗎!
Swishily gay, gay, gay, gay...
So stylish and relaxed
——如此有型又閒適
Is he gay or European
他到底是基佬還是歐洲人?
I think his chest is waxed
——我覺得他用蠟去過胸毛呢
But they bring their boys up different there
——但你知道歐洲人養男孩方式和咱不一樣的
It's culturally diverse
從文化上就涇渭分明
It's not a fashion curse
這應該不是一種時尚詛咒
If he wears a kilt or bears a purse
——那如果他穿蘇格蘭小短裙或拎個小坤包還情有可原
Gay or just exotic
到底是基,還是只是異國風情?
I still can't crack the code
我還是破解不了啊!
Yeah, his accent is hypnotic
他的迷人口音也許還能瞞天過海
but his shoes art pointy-toed
但他的尖頭鞋完全暴露了!
So many shades of gray
這真是模稜兩可
But if he turns out straight
但若他真是直男
I'm free at eight on Saturday
老娘周六八點有空
Is he gay or European
基佬還是歐洲人
Give me a chance to crack this guy
給我個機會讓我揭穿這個傢伙!
I've an idea I'd like to try
我有個辦法可以試試
The floor is yours
——那就看你的啦!
So Mr. Argitacos
那麼 Argitacos 先生
This alleged affair with Ms. Windam
您和 Windom 小姐這段所謂的婚外情
Has been going on for?
已經持續了多久?
And your first name again is?
那先生,您的大名是?
And your boyfriend's name is?
那你男朋友的名字是……?
I'm sorry, I misunderstand
等等不好意思?我聽錯了!
I thought you said best friend
我以為你說摯友
Carlos is my best friend
Carlos 是我的摯友
You bustard, you lying bustard
你個混蛋!你個撒謊的混蛋!
That is it, I no cover for you, no more
我再也不幫你這家話瞞着了!再也不了!
Peoples, I have a big announcement
大家!我有個大事要宣布!
This man is gay and European
這傢伙既是基佬又是歐洲人!
Whoa, and neither is his place
(哇嗚)而二者都不可恥
You've got to stop your being a completely closet case
我說你現在必須結束這深櫃狀態
It's me, not her he's seein'
根他談戀愛的是我,不是她
No matter what he say
不管這傢伙說什麼
I swear, he never ever, ever swing the other way
我發誓他從來沒對女人感過興趣
You are so gay, you big parfait
你就是這麼基,百分百純天然基
You flaming boy in cabaret
你個浪出或的大!咚!佬!
You were not yesterday
你昨天晚上可不是啊,先生
So if I may, I'm proud to say
所以恕我直言,我要驕傲地宣布
He's gay and European
他是基佬!(並且也是歐洲人!)
He's gay and European
他是基佬!(並且也是歐洲人!)
He's gay and European and gay
他是基佬!(並且也是歐洲人!還是個基佬!)
Fine, ok, I'm gay
好吧我承認我是基佬